Meet Me Where I Am

I only posted two times on this blog last year and thinking about it makes me panic a little. This used to be the place where I joined with my community of survivors and seekers. It was my sanity check, my sanctuary and the place where I felt validated and heard. But when I sit … Continue reading Meet Me Where I Am

Finally Clean

I had a two-day meltdown last month, which seems to happen every July. I don’t know what the trigger is exactly, other than that most of the abuse I can remember happened during the summer months. It used to bother me, not knowing why it was always July, and now I think that maybe it’s a … Continue reading Finally Clean

What Owns Me

I bend down and attach the leash to her halter. Her whole body wags in anticipation and she looks up at me with chocolate eyes, her fluffy ears cocked. Unlatch the gate and we’re off. Where will we go? This is not a charming neighborhood. These are small, mid-century, single level homes. You are more likely to … Continue reading What Owns Me

Transformation, Self-Compassion and a Little Bit of Hogwash

I woke up January 1, 2015 with no anxiety about anything. I'm serious. I have never started a new year without anxiety. When it wasn’t financial anxiety, it was career anxiety. When it wasn’t career anxiety, it was relationship or family anxiety. There has always been something to be worried about. On this New Year’s … Continue reading Transformation, Self-Compassion and a Little Bit of Hogwash

Stop kissing the minivan

My husband and I were discussing the possibility of selling my minivan and getting a newer vehicle when my son, who will be 6 in a couple of weeks, overheard us. “Are you talking about the van? You’re talking about selling the van? You can’t sell the van. I love that van. Don’t sell the … Continue reading Stop kissing the minivan

Brave

I felt too tethered to the earth last week. I walked through each day with a sense that something was coming, or maybe more like something was happening but I didn’t know what. It was like that time I had a dream about the woman who adopted my cat. I only met her once but … Continue reading Brave

Healing

I’ve read some great posts lately which have given me insight into the process of healing. I’ll share the links at the bottom. So often, we think of healing as something we’re doing for ourselves so that we can stand to live in our skin, tolerate difficult circumstances or move on from people, choices and … Continue reading Healing

The Flashback

Trigger warning: This post is about sexual molestation. If this is a trigger for you, please take care of yourself. About 17 years ago, my husband and I were friends with a couple who had a teenage daughter. She was 14 and was pretty in the way that would someday become beautiful. I couldn’t help … Continue reading The Flashback

5 Lessons of Adversity I Hope Everyone Experiences

Life is hard. Even when life is really, really good, it’s hard. I’ve always been drawn to warriors who have lived hard lives because they’re the ones who will tell it like it is. They’ll tell you that the circumstances they’ve faced have beaten them down but that it’s a choice to stand back up. … Continue reading 5 Lessons of Adversity I Hope Everyone Experiences